In my dance class today, we got to perform our final project. My group made a modern/lyrical dance to Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap. My group got to go last (and I certainly think we were the best).
After we performed, our dance teacher had us do it again. Then, she had us wait after class, and she went and got camera people and a videographer to make a momento of our dance for Oregon State. Um, big deal. We were all so surprised. I really loved the way it turned out and it has always been a dream of mine to choregraph this song. I love to dance. When I dance, I feel alive. I am so glad I picked it back up. I am so glad my dance teacher encourages me to keep going. She reminds me that I am good. She challenges me to take more advanced classes so I can get better.
I guess God kinda does the same thing with us sometimes. He gently reminds us how beautiful and talented we are by using us to accomplish his purposes. He loves to show off his magnificent ways through his children. God uses difficulties to challenge us so we can grow more of a dependance on Him.
He makes beautiful things. He makes beautiful things out of us.
Today, I was walking around on campus and I saw a blind man walking with his little stick. (I don't actually know what it is called. Walking stick? Sure. Let's call it that. Then opened the newspaper. The front page story was about a student at OSU without knees and only has three fingers on her hands.
It dawned on me. I am SO blessed. I can see. My eyesight works just fine. I can walk. I am mobile. I am relatively healthy. There are so many things about myself I take for granted. I have 5 fingers on each hand, and 5 fingers on each foot. I am relatively normal. I can communicate. I have so many things to be thankful for. So here I am, expressing my thankfulness simply for the fact that I am alive and that I am me.
Today was also a fabulous day because I got to sit in on a Ballet 3 class. I cannot tell you how much I enjoyed it. Words cannot even express. I love to dance. I'm so glad I'm taking more dance next term. :)
AND today was sunny and a whopping 64 degrees. This is odd mostly because it snowed like 2 days ago. WEIRD weather around my parts, let me tell you. At work today, I got to play outside with the kids and sit in the warm sun for a whole 30 minutes. HELLO, Vitamin D. And there were only 8 kids today, so I got to spend a lot of one-on-one time with them. Love those kiddos so much. They light up my life and they don't even know it.
In my Social Development class today, I got like 4 of my classmates to play DrawSomething with me. YESSSS. Funnest game ever. Download it for free on the Iphone or Ipad. You'll love it, I promise. (AND play me! username daretobedifferent) We had a great discussion about this new KONY movement. Have you heard about this? We spent the reast of our 2 hour class watching youtube videos about this movement and invisible children.
I had a good day. Yes, a good day indeed. I'm off to bible study in the next 40 minutes or so. I made handmade goodie bags for each girl in my group and I'm so excited to give them to them!
I used to be a dancer. I used to be a good dancer, some would say. I've been realizing more and more how much I miss being in dance. I used to be in classes for hours every day, all week long. I'd be dancing at school, dancing after school. I was extremely busy and dedicated to the art. And most of all, I loved it. Dance made me feel alive.
When I was a senior in high school, I even danced at my church in the worship dance ministry. I loved being a part of this ministry. We would meet together once a week, learn more choreography, and spend time praying and immersed in the word together. I'm longing to start something like that at a church up here. I'm in this video, and I even choreographed some of it.
My love for dance has always been there. But I didn't start taking classes until long after I quit gymnastics. But, I spent summer dance dancing with my friends, choreographing dances and preforming them. I had no shame. No fear.
I signed up for a dance class in high school and I was hooked. I loved it, and I took dance every year of high school after that. While taking classes at school, I got frustrated with myself. I had trouble with my memory, with choreography, with auditioning, with technique. Some days, I would walk out of the class. I made it into a personal failure, although it wasn't.
My senior year, I finally was able to be in a dance class outside of school because I could drive myself. So I signed up for classes two days a week at one studio, and two days a week at another studio. (I drove a lot). Beginning classes were too easy. But the level of my age group was difficult, and I felt myself being embarrassed or NOT good enough.
I was torn. Do I give up dance? or Do I continue to feel insecure and unable to succeed in classes?
With the help of my major dancer friend, Angela, I kept taking classes in the summer. The feelings didn't go away. When I miss dance, I watch people preform, longing to be one of them. I used to be great. But I need more training, more help. But at my age, they don't offer it.
Angela and I as seniors in high school after Winter Formal
I long to be on pointe one day. Or at least a beautiful skilled dancer, again.
The barre is one of the most beautiful and raw places to me
Angela and I, TuTus and all
Twin Day: Wearing Legwarmers, OF COURSE
I won't let my fear of failure hold me back. I want to dance. Again.
