November 24, 2012

30 days of Thankfulness: Day 24

Day 24: I'm thankful for blogging.
I'm thankful for the community of people and amazing women I follow. I'm thankful for the friends I've come to know and love through blogging. I'm thankful for the inspiration, encouragement and love. I'm thankful for the very small group of people who follow my blog.

Saying that, I decided to announce that after 30 days of Thankfulness, I think I'm going to stop blogging. My blog has reached its free space limit and I feel like I'm running out of things to say and share. I love to write, but I'm not sure this is the place to do it anymore. Maybe one day I'll start a new blog, but for now I'm closing the door.

November 23, 2012

30 days of thankfulness : I'm behind about a week...

Day 16: I'm thankful for fun times with friends I get to see as much as I want to! I got to meet up with Anna on Friday for a drink and it was a much needed night out with lots of laughter.

Day 17: I'm thankful for the luxury I have to live in a nice home with good friends.

Day 18: I'm thankful for food. My friends and I got together for a pre-thanksgiving feast and it was yummy!

Day 19: I'm thankful for cuddles and kisses on the forehead. Although this sounds like a Greg reference, it is not. Monday night at Bible Study, we all cuddled and prayed together and it was a really nice time. I kissed Lacey on the forehead and it meant a lot to her. :)

Day 20: I'm thankful for prayer. I'm on the prayer team in my college group, and I am available during the service to pray with those who need it. I really enjoy this time. This week, I had a good friend of mine approach me for prayer and it really meant a lot to me to pray to God with her.

Day 21: I'm thankful for Lacey. (she's one of my roommates!) She's so sweet and loving. I am so blessed to live with this wonderful woman of the Lord. She stayed in town an extra night and made me a yummy dinner just so I wouldn't have to be alone in our house all by myself for several days.

Day 22: I'm thankful for a community away from "home" to spend Holidays with. Greg's family and friends invited me to spend Thanksgiving with them and it was a BIG blessing. There were lots of laughs, new games, and excellent food. That is what I consider a good Holiday.

Day 23: I'm thankful for new experiences. Today, I got to go wine tasting with Greg and his parents. I didn't like the wine we tasted all too much, but it was a new experience, and I enjoyed that I got to do it with Greg!

November 15, 2012

30 days of Thankfulness: Day 15

Day 15: I'm thankful for my brain.

I'm thankful that my brain works. I'm thankful that I can think critically and have opinions about things. I'm thankful I go to a University where I am challenged to form and have my own opinion about every topic imaginable. I'm down right thankful for my mind and my ability to learn, grow, and imagine with it.

November 14, 2012

30 Days of Thankfulness: Day 14

Day 14: today I am thankful for heated blankets and sunshine that streams in the windows.

I'm thankful for breaks in the rain and very chilly fall weather. I'm thankful for the warm drinks I get to consume, the fires I get to sit by, and the blankets I get to cuddle up under. And the sweet, special people I get to do those things with. :)

November 13, 2012

30 days of Thankfulness: day 13

Day 13: Today I am thankful for my family.

I'm thankful for the support of my family. There is no way I would be able to be successful at what I'm doing if it wasn't for these people. I'm thankful for how quirky we are. I'm thankful for how we watch insane amounts of football. I'm thankful for my mom and how she keeps the peace. I'm thankful for how we talk about our issues honestly. I'm thankful for the yummy food we make in the kitchen together. I'm thankful for my dad and how he is almost always the voice of reality. I'm thankful for how our family traditions change almost every year. I'm thankful for my brother and his ability to be able to fix just about everything.
We're a crazy bunch, but I sure do love them.

November 12, 2012

30 days of thankfulness:day 12

Day 12: today I am thankful for rain.

I love rain. Sometimes. You know, when it's not wet, or cold, or coming out of the sky. But really, I do love rain. And I have to because I live in a place in the country where it rains A LOT. I love rain because I chained my perspective. Rain is beautiful in it's own way. It falls from the sky and makes beautiful sounds and smells. Sometimes once is starts, it never stops. It reminds me of Gods grace. We can't do anything to make it come or go-it just is given to us freely. And it makes us beautiful, new, and clean.

God is in the rain.

November 11, 2012

30 days of Thankfulness: Day 11

Day 11: I am thankful for alcohol.

Seems like an odd thing to be thankful for, but I got to spend the day brewing beer with Greg and I really enjoyed it. I mean, its Greg. :) I always enjoy spending time with him. I'm thankful for the yummy drinks I can make and the time I get to spend with friends while enjoying a drink.

November 10, 2012

30 days of Thankfulness: 6, 7, 8, 9, 10

Day 6: I am thankful for the election of a new President in the United States. I am thankful that I got to vote and my vote counted. I am thankful for being able to have a say in who runs the country I call home.

Day 7: I am thankful for the opportunity and ability to go to class. I had class pretty late on Wednesday (like I do every week) and I am thankful for the ability I have to learn.

Day 8: I am thankful for the opportunity to have a babysitting job. I love the afternoons I get to spend with these kiddos. They make me smile, laugh, and even get ginormous bruises on my arms.

Day 9: I am thankful for Jesus. I am thankful for his never-ending love for me. I am thankful for His grace and how He has saved me. I would absolutely not be where I am today with the grace and love that has been given to me through God.

Day 10: I'm thankful for yummy food. Really yummy food.

November 5, 2012

30 days of Thankfulness: Day 5

Day 5: Today I am thankful for warm fall weather.

The weather has been foggy and fall like and I enjoyed the high of 64 degrees today. Its nice to sleep in shorts and be able to not wear socks cuz my poor little toes feel like they will chip off at any moment.

30 Days of Thankfulness: Day 3 & 4

Day 3: I am thankful for Oregon State University football and the win of the Beavers. 7-1!

Day 4: I am thankful for Greg and how much he cares about me and made an effort to have quality time with me this weekend. :) (and help me study for a killer test I have today!)

November 3, 2012

30 Days of Thankfulness: Day 2

I failed at writing yesterday, so this is for November 2nd.

I am thankful to live in the Willamette Valley in Oregon. Where the leaves change pretty colors. Where we experience all types of weather in one day. Where I get to experience seasons. Where for class, I get to walk around campus and look at trees. Where I have the opportunity to go to Oregon State University.

November 1, 2012

30 Days of Thankfulness

For November, I like to think of one thing everyday to be thankful for. This year, I decided to share them every day on my blog.

Day 1: my roommates
Since I started college, I had dreamed of living in a cute Victorianish house with a bunch of friends close to campus. Finally, my fifth year in school, this dream becomes a reality. I live with people who are not only my roommates, but my friends. People to pray with, to support me (and support them), and to laugh at all the ridiculously wrong things I hear and do. God has really blessed me with these people.

October 24, 2012

OSU 6-0!!

Tenth Avenue North in concert with a bunch of friends and my bestie.

October 18, 2012

Awesome and Awkward Thursday

  • My roommates
  • 242
  • My study buddies
  • Babysitting 3 really awesome kids on Thursdays
  • Getting to watch ballet class on Thursdays
  • Good grades in class
  • TJ's Indian Food for dinner
  • Organic Lollipops from TJ's
  • Laughing at my bad political jokes with my boyfriend
  • My boyfriend :)
  •  Running into a girl on campus, knowing I know her, and trying to remember her name for dear life
  • A girl drinking a fatty bottle of Pale Ale in class. IN CLASS. Seriously? 
  • Texting while walking, and nearly walking into my roommate. Literally. 
  • The people who think it is okay to talk through the entire lecture. Thanks, I definitely came to class to hear what YOU had to say 
  • Getting home and having nowhere to park so I keep driving around the block. Again. and Again. 
  • Walking through ballet class cuz I had to pee. My darn tiny bladder. 
  • Trying to explain to children that I don't live with my mommy and daddy. I haven't quite figured out how to yet, and every time it stumps them. 
  • Opening my door yesterday to a pretty little kitty on my porch that tried to run into my house. Then it followed my halfway to school. 
  • The man in my sustainability class who talked about replacing his flushing toilet for one that you cover with bark chips after you do your business. That's just awkward. No thank you. 

October 17, 2012


I'm a failure. It isn't because I got a bad grade on a test or because I treated a friend poorly.

I'm a failure because I failed to give God my everything. God sent his son to die for me on the cross. Without Him, I wouldn't have life. This life is NOT my own. But it belongs fully to God. It is all about His will, His way.

"...if we're going to live for Christ, we have to die to ourselves: our dreams, our hopes, our futures, our wills."

I have not been allowing God into every part of my life. I have been giving him little chunks here and there, leftovers mostly. My focus has not been on Him, at all. And I want it to be. I think I'm taking a good step just by realizing I have not been doing so.

I'm struggling with this. I don't know how to rely on God in the little things. He has so richly blessed me. I don't need to rely on Him for material provision. I don't need to rely on Him for a hope. I already have that in Him, but my life is good right now. I know I owe everything good to Him, and I acknowledge that with my thankfulness. I'm stuck. And I'm trying.

October 7, 2012

Am I just faking it?

Sometimes I wonder if I'm faking it. I wonder when I will be exposed for faking it.
In high school, on dance team, when I couldn't get a move just right I'd fake it til I made it. This doesn't quite work I have to figure out how to actually do it, and I don't know how. I don't know how to be an adult. I'm just trying and miserably failing.

I look at "normal" events as things that would never happen to me. Ya know, graduation, getting married, having babies, etc etc. I don't know why I look at them that way, but I do. I just feel so out of the norm that I don't see the possibility that those things would actually be part of my life. I took a VARK learning styles assessment for one of my classes today and I realized how I have one of the hardest learning styles out there. I feel like things don't come as easily to me as they do other people. I feel like I have to go the extra mile just to do average in things. Sometimes this makes me not try. But I don't want the odds to keep me from trying, from doing my best, and searching to glorify God even in the mundane.

So again, I wonder, and I just faking my way through life? I don't want to. And I really hope I'm not.

October 1, 2012


I'm thinking of getting a new blog. My life is fully of new things: I've moved, changed my major, new clothes, new people, new year..etc etc. Get the idea? I'll keep you updated.

This is my new house! 
I live here with 5 people: Matt, Misha, Deanie, Lacey, and myself. We are trying to think of a name for our house. I thought of LDS (with Mormon Missionaries), but that has been rejected, and I think we settled on the MANsion. We'll see about that one. Matt really likes it.

Here are some pictures of my life as of lately. I've been kinda busy starting school and nannying. But its a good kinda busy, and I'm really enjoying school so far this term.
Dates with my sweetheart
Girls Nights

Epic games of Catch Phrase after 242
Last Friday was so much fun. It started with a lovely dinner made by Taylor with some really great people.
 The night ended listening to Lacey tell stories of Brazil, drinks and appetizers at Block 15, and a big group of friends I am really blessed to have. (only the girls are pictured)

Also, Saturday was pretty epic. I went on a tandem ride with my sweetheart, had a little picnic in a park where we got to enjoy some us time. Then my bestie Brynn came into town and we got some beaver gear. Then, Beavers pretty much dominated (but it was close) Arizona. Great night. Great life. GREAT God.

P.S. Gungor has a new song. And it is free here! It's pretty great. God has made us spotless and that is something to celebrate.

September 26, 2012


I belong to an amazing community of college students and young adults. How do I know? Last night was our kickoff and I was feeling pretty apprenshive. I was excited, but I didn't know what to expect. Not to mention, I've been feeling off in my relationship with God, so I really didn't know how I'd feel. When a certain song came on, all of that went away.

Higher than the mountains that I face
Stronger than the power of the grave
Constant through the trial and the change
One thing remains
One thing remains

Your love never fails 
it never gives up 
it never runs out on me
[ Lyrics from: ]
There is NOTHING we can do to make Jesus' love for us go away. His love for us is. It is constant. It will never fail. It will never give up. It will never change or go away. Even our whole world crumbles, His love will remain.  That truth is absolutely beautiful to me. And a reminder I need all too often.

September 23, 2012

What do I do?

God is good. It is one of the many things I know without a doubt.

But what do I do when I don't feel my need for Him? My life is going well. God has answered so many prayers of my heart that I don't know what to do. I feel blessed. I know I need Him, I know I can do NOTHING apart from Him, but I still struggle to feel it. I have always gotten close to God during the trying times. How do I cling to His presence in the times of joy? Joy is new to me. I always had to struggle to find the light in the darkness, not the other way around. I know He is the only one who can fill me, and I'm not looking elsewhere, I just don't feel broken. I know he makes me new every single morning, but what do I do when I don't feel dirty enough to be remade?

I don't want to see God's truth and know it. I want to live it, to feel it, to embrace it, and need it. Daily. Every hour. I want to live out with every ounce of my being the truth I follow.

What do I do when I immersed myself so much in the Word that I read the whole thing? What do I read next? Do I keep reading? Do I re-read the devotional I have already read all the way through? I don't know where to turn. Do I open a new devotional? I'm struggling here. I'm struggling with how to seek God further. I know I need to turn to Him, but I don't even know where to start. I feel flat-lined.

September 20, 2012

The sun has set

It is weird to think YOU had the power to shatter my world. It is so weird that I thought I loved you then.

The truth was we both were slowly bringing out the worst in each other until it became too much and snapped.

I am thankful for the day it all changed and I will be for the rest of my life. That is the day I began to heal, the day I let it go and was finally free to never look back.

You have no manipulative power over me anymore. Cuz now you're just somebody that I used to know. And I couldn't be more thankful you are gone.

September 16, 2012


I start school one week from tomorrow. ONE WEEK. Okay, so most people would be writing about how summer is ending blah, blah blah. I do not feel that way! I feel like I had a really great summer. It wasn't really what I expected or planned, but I enjoyed myself. I tried new things, traveled, got to be a maid of honor in my best friends wedding, went to concerts, and moved. All in all, it has been a really great summer.
I have really wonderful people in my life. Without a doubt.

I am so excited for school to start! I got my classes all worked out after a lot of headache. So far, I'm still on the waiting list for dance, but that's okay with me. I'm okay with waiting it out until winter term.

Things are really looking up. After a summer of having so much of my life up in the air, it feels so good. I have a nice place to live, close to campus, with 4 roommates. I got a babysitting job that requires maybe 10 hours a week, which is pretty much perfect right now. I also started working out and I'm feeling really good about the changes I am making in both diet and lifestyle. I bought some red skinnys as a bold move and I'm excited for fall and to experiment a bit. (Hopefully, I'll be showing you what I'm wearing). I am always amazed how God takes care of his children. I am such a silly dumb lost sheep sometimes, working and working to get things to work out when all I need to do is be still. I have a Father who knows better anyway.

"The Lord will fight for you; all you need to do is be still." Exodus 14:14

In Christ alone my hope is found
He is my light, my strength, my song
This Cornerstone, this solid ground
Firm through the fiercest drought and storm
What heights of love, what depths of peace
When fears are stilled, when strivings cease
My Comforter, my All in All
Here in the love of Christ I stand

September 10, 2012


BEAVER GAME DAY! We played Wisconsin...and we WON!!!
I love game day. And I love the people I have in my life.

September 5, 2012

Ya know when...

you move and you suddenly have much more stuff without places to go than before? Yep. That is how I feel right now. If anyone has creative suggestions I would really really love them. I might even beg at your feet for them. My room is pretty much a disaster. I just want to be settled in and know where all my stuff is. One day it will happen. For now, I'm constantly stepping over piles. Yay.

September 4, 2012

live it out

If you are not struggling daily to live it, you don't really believe it. 

Bam. Talk about a quote. Just some food for thought for your sunny day after labor day.

September 1, 2012


It's official. I have moved! Keys are turned in and I have said goodbye to the apartment I lived in for way too long. I'm so excited to live in this new house and the laughter and life that is going to happen here. I just spent my first night in my new room and it was splendid. I am so excited!

A big big big thank you to my moving team: Deanie and Greg!

August 29, 2012


Everyone loves stories. Don't they?

Stories take you back to another time in your life. Stories make you laugh, make you cry, make you feel again what you experienced in that exact moment you are retelling. Stories are full of beauty. I love stories.

About 4 years ago, my mom and I were driving on a dark Oregon road to my grandparents house. It was late at night and we had been in the car for a very very long time coming from California. We were maybe 10 minutes away from my grandparents house when we heard a strange sound. We pulled over, and I saw our tire. It was completly blown. We were in trouble.
My mom started to worry. All I was worried about is that I had to pee. So I told my mom to remain calm and we would just call AAA. So we took out our phones and we had no service. NONE. So we couldn't call my grandparents to tell them we were going to be late. As if this wasn't an adventure enough, my mom has a broken arm and was in a cast. If that wasn't enough, our car was completely full of my stuff because I was moving to college for the first time. To access the spare tire, we needed to empty the entire car in the dark, late at night on a windy two lane Oregon highway.

We prayed. We prayed for someone to help, a miracle. We didn't know what else to do. After some waiting, I told my mom to wave my white pillowcase out the window. She did. A few people drove by in what seemed like forever. No one really stopped and the cars were becoming less and less. One person finally slowed down, but shouted out the window, and then drove off. We were really starting to worry that we would be spending the night in the car. I really worried that I was going to pee my pants.

Finally, a man pulled up behind us. My mom was really worried so she locked the car and barely rolled the window down a crack. He asked if we were alright, and we told him we had a flat. He offered to help. We got out of the car and showed him the problem. We told him we had a car full of stuff. He willingly told us, "I can fix that!" After he was finished and put on the spare, he introduced himself. He stumbled over his named and murmured "A-A-Aaron." We thanked him so very much and got back in our car. As we looked in the rear-view mirror, his car and lights were nowhere to be found. It was almost as if he disappeared. Our prayer was answered. We believe Aaron was an angel. The story gives us chills. But there is no other explanation about what happened that night and what we experienced.

August 22, 2012

Weekend in Portland

I had such a great weekend in Portland with Caeli! I drove up Friday afternoon and we spent the afternoon talking and catching up. We laid down for a bit and ended up napping until we had to leave for the University of Portland Pilots soccer game.
It was such a great game. We sported purple just for the occasion. 
The Portland Pilots ended up winning the game 1 to 0. It was a really great game! Caeli and I enjoyed the whole game and chatted the whole time about playing soccer in the spring with intramural at Dixon.

Saturday we got the opportunity to go to the Fish Festival. We got free front row passes! It was a great day. Preforming was: Mark Shultz, P.F.R, Matt Maher, Fireflight, Downhere, Britt Nicole, Kutless, and Jeremy Camp!

It was such a fun day. I love this girl so much! On Sunday, we went to church. I felt like such a bad person. I accidentally took a shot of wine during communion, and then we left second service early to get margaritas. I don't really have any shame. I enjoyed every minute of it.

August 17, 2012

Recap: a week in the life

This last week has been nothing but absolute craziness!

last Thursday: Bachelorette Party for Emily in downtown Portland
All the Ladies!

Friday: last minute wedding craziness and rehearsal dinner

Saturday: WEDDING DAY!
getting her hair done!
morning of the day!
the Beautiful Bride and Maid of Honor
My handsome date! :)
The couple's first dance
the 4 of us :)
Later Saturday evening, I drove to my Aunt's house and started family craziness! My aunt was having a surprise 50th birthday party and I got there just to enjoy the tail end of it (still in wedding attire!)
My big brother and I
Sunday: What a great day! We had church outside at my uncle's cute little country church. After church, we had a chilli cook-off picnic and played all sorts of games.
Me and Dan with our grandparents!
I'm the auntie of this cute little kid :)
my Mom and I. Isn't she beautiful?
Blake and my Mom playing in the grass
my Grandma playing and singing with Blake
Later that afternoon, we got to watch old family videos of when my mom was a kid. It was so cool to see my mom as a little kid and my grandma as a cute little young thang! We decided to spend the evening hiking Multnomah Falls!
All the cousins! We're all so big now! 
Me with Dan, Stasia, and Blake
Oregon is stunning!
Dan and I at the top

After the hike, we all went out for pizza!

Monday: We had a leisure morning and then we decided to go float the Sandy River. 
Dan tied the canoe to the car!
Family picnic
Dan and I floating along
Stasia and I showing our excitement!

Tuesday: I'm back in Corvallis! Anna and I did our blackberry goodness!

Wednesday: Emily and Jonathan drove through Corvallis post-honeymoon, so they met up with Greg and I for a bit. We ate at American Dream pizza and strolled a bit through campus. Later that evening, my family arrived! We went out for Indian Food and stayed up late all talking. 

Thursday: We spent the morning walking around the OSU campus!
Starting him young: He's a beaver believer!
I literally said while taking this picture, "Oh no! I'm ganna look like a freshman!"
In front of Valley Library: Dan, me and Mom

Blake and I in class
We spent a bit of the afternoon cooling down in my apartment and then headed south to the Oregon Coast!
It was in the 60's!
Stasia and I found a really cool pirate ship slide!
We went to Mo's for dinner and enjoyed yummy clam chowder!
I had a great time with my family! I'm so excited for this weekend and my adventures with Caeli in Portland!

This summer has been nothing like I expected, but I have been overwhelmed with love, friendship, and God's faithfulness. I love the many adventures I have gotten to go on, experience, learn from, and grow.